It has been ages since I have posted anything! And since I am avoiding studying for a test I have to take today, this seems like the perfect time! I will keep it short though.
So once upon a time a little girl was sitting in her 2nd Grade class room doing her assignment. Out of habit she began humming a happy little tune. Suddenly the teacher asked who was making noise, looking around the little girl was puzzled as to who would have the audacity to disrupt the class. Unable to find the perpetrator the class when back to work. Once again the little girl began humming. Finally the teacher realized who it was, and asked the little girl if she was humming. Completely unaware that humming was something that was shared with the world the little girl was horror struck! Who would have thought that something so personal as humming would be shared with all in ear shot? I certainly would not have thought so!
As you might have guess that little girl was indeed me, and yes it was devastating to find that even something so quiet as humming was automatically exposed to the world. I find it upsetting that even to this day I will not hum in public, not sure exactly why. As I was walking into the library today to "study" I heard a kid humming and was amazed. Sure, it is simple, I mean who can't hum, wait that's a dumb comment...everyone can hum, not everyone should. Still my world was changed when I came to the realization that humming was not a private matter. I will never be able to hum with the joy that I did before this realization.
Don't worry I still will write about my trip to Texas, I just need more time to set aside.
Until later,
Unable to Hum
Showing posts with label Memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Memories. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Caught in the whirlwind called life...
It has been a very long time since I last posted anything, and a lot has happened. I have been on two trips, had a birthday, and had many forgotten moments that would have been worth mentioning. Unfortunately, some things many have been lost, but that is to be expected when there is so much happening in ones life. My typical Friday goes something like this...wake up 7am, workout 8am, work 9:30-12:30pm, either work 4-8 or babysit 5-11ish...of course the evening varies week to week, but it is essentially the same thing, earning money and losing sleep. Each other day of the week is equally busy, and filled with more or less the same thing. For now I desire to recall a few very fond memories that remind me of the important things in life.
Over the past year, my family has lost a few close friends. Each was unexpected and equally difficult for my father. Those of which I am writing about now were all men, in similar health and age to my father, and they were all friends of his. The memories of which I choose to recall are as follows:
1). Dave passed away leaving his wife, 3 sons, and daughter. Though I do not have a specific memory of Dave, I admire him for many reasons which I will now explain. Prior to becoming sick, Dave felt impressed to pay off all debts, and ensure that his family was taken care of. Following this prompting, he paid off his home, and a debt. While it is hard to know if he knew that he would not be here much longer, or if he was just trying to follow the council of the prophets, the important thing is that he followed the prompting of the spirit and blessed his family in countless ways. Dave was an engineer, he worked specifically on pacemakers. I recall Dave telling a story of a young man and the lose of his life. Because he works with pacemakers, one of the things that he must do is to monitor to pacemakers, to ensure that they are functioning correctly. When a pacemaker is failing, he is notified. Sometimes there are things that he can do, and other times there is nothing he can do. He told of a time in which he was notified and there was nothing he could do. He said that the most difficult thing was being forced to watch this young mans heart suffer and fail and have no way to help. He related the experience to how the savior feels when we chose to do things that harm us on an eternal perspective. I will forever admire Dave, and look forward to seeing him again someday.
2). Sean passed away alone in his house, and left behind a son. Sean worked for my parents. Shortly after Sean lost his job (as did we all) he and his wife divorced, leaving him alone. His death was the result of a malfunction of antidepressants. Shortly after hearing of the death of Sean, I was sitting in my sisters house trying to access the Internet. When all of a sudden I was connected to the Internet. At the time I could have sworn that was Sean's way of communicating with me that all was fine and that I should not fear. I now remember that I set up my computer to save the information necessary to connect to my sisters wireless, however, I cannot deny the feeling of peace that I felt when the event occurred.
3). Dallas passed away of unknown causes. Dallas was my father's friend from church. He was a stubborn veteran, addicted to morphine due to his time in the military. One of my last memories of Dallas was on the night before crimsonnaire initiations. He was over at my house, and he knew that I was worried about whether or not I would make it. I knew that initiations would happen that night, and that knowledge alone probably made it more stressful. I had to work that night, and while I was at work I got a phone call. To my surprise it was Dallas, he asked me for my cell phone number, confused, I gave it to him. I then went and got my phone and took it into the room I was working in (shh...don't tell my boss). A few minutes later, I received a text from an unknown number that said "Hey you know that thing you was worried about, don't". It was that moment that I knew I would make it! While it took away the element of surprise, it felt really good to know that Dallas cared enough about me to go through so much effort to keep me from worrying.
I know that talking about people that have died is not really uplifting, and you might be thinking I am now some Gothic, pain-loving weirdo...but I am not, sorry to disappoint you. I do have a reason. These three individuals all taught me important life lessons about what is important. From Brother Wiggins I gained a stronger testimony of the importance of following the promptings of the spirit. From Sean I became more sure that death is not a thing to fear because it will all be okay in the end. And finally from Dallas I have yet another example of how important it is to take the time to show others that we care about them. While caught in the whirlwind of life, it is easy to forget what really matters. It is only when we take the time to stop and think that we realize what we have been doing is insignificant in the larger scheme of things.
Until later,
Reevaluating what is important
Over the past year, my family has lost a few close friends. Each was unexpected and equally difficult for my father. Those of which I am writing about now were all men, in similar health and age to my father, and they were all friends of his. The memories of which I choose to recall are as follows:
1). Dave passed away leaving his wife, 3 sons, and daughter. Though I do not have a specific memory of Dave, I admire him for many reasons which I will now explain. Prior to becoming sick, Dave felt impressed to pay off all debts, and ensure that his family was taken care of. Following this prompting, he paid off his home, and a debt. While it is hard to know if he knew that he would not be here much longer, or if he was just trying to follow the council of the prophets, the important thing is that he followed the prompting of the spirit and blessed his family in countless ways. Dave was an engineer, he worked specifically on pacemakers. I recall Dave telling a story of a young man and the lose of his life. Because he works with pacemakers, one of the things that he must do is to monitor to pacemakers, to ensure that they are functioning correctly. When a pacemaker is failing, he is notified. Sometimes there are things that he can do, and other times there is nothing he can do. He told of a time in which he was notified and there was nothing he could do. He said that the most difficult thing was being forced to watch this young mans heart suffer and fail and have no way to help. He related the experience to how the savior feels when we chose to do things that harm us on an eternal perspective. I will forever admire Dave, and look forward to seeing him again someday.
2). Sean passed away alone in his house, and left behind a son. Sean worked for my parents. Shortly after Sean lost his job (as did we all) he and his wife divorced, leaving him alone. His death was the result of a malfunction of antidepressants. Shortly after hearing of the death of Sean, I was sitting in my sisters house trying to access the Internet. When all of a sudden I was connected to the Internet. At the time I could have sworn that was Sean's way of communicating with me that all was fine and that I should not fear. I now remember that I set up my computer to save the information necessary to connect to my sisters wireless, however, I cannot deny the feeling of peace that I felt when the event occurred.
3). Dallas passed away of unknown causes. Dallas was my father's friend from church. He was a stubborn veteran, addicted to morphine due to his time in the military. One of my last memories of Dallas was on the night before crimsonnaire initiations. He was over at my house, and he knew that I was worried about whether or not I would make it. I knew that initiations would happen that night, and that knowledge alone probably made it more stressful. I had to work that night, and while I was at work I got a phone call. To my surprise it was Dallas, he asked me for my cell phone number, confused, I gave it to him. I then went and got my phone and took it into the room I was working in (shh...don't tell my boss). A few minutes later, I received a text from an unknown number that said "Hey you know that thing you was worried about, don't". It was that moment that I knew I would make it! While it took away the element of surprise, it felt really good to know that Dallas cared enough about me to go through so much effort to keep me from worrying.
I know that talking about people that have died is not really uplifting, and you might be thinking I am now some Gothic, pain-loving weirdo...but I am not, sorry to disappoint you. I do have a reason. These three individuals all taught me important life lessons about what is important. From Brother Wiggins I gained a stronger testimony of the importance of following the promptings of the spirit. From Sean I became more sure that death is not a thing to fear because it will all be okay in the end. And finally from Dallas I have yet another example of how important it is to take the time to show others that we care about them. While caught in the whirlwind of life, it is easy to forget what really matters. It is only when we take the time to stop and think that we realize what we have been doing is insignificant in the larger scheme of things.
Until later,
Reevaluating what is important
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Remember when...
Just some fun memories....
Remember when we thought we were so cool because we got to sit on the football field and watch the sunrise...
Remember when we turned down dates to go to the invitational dance with friends, and it turned out to be the best decision ever...
Remember when we went to the color festival and breathed in chalk for two minutes and loved every second of it...
Remember when Stephanie cut my hair and it turned out really good (suprisingly)...
....but this was the process we had to go through, which was a little nerve racking...
Most of these were from my freshman year at BYU, (the first on is the only exception). Random I know... but they were good times!
Remember when we thought we were so cool because we got to sit on the football field and watch the sunrise...
Remember when we turned down dates to go to the invitational dance with friends, and it turned out to be the best decision ever... Remember when we went to the color festival and breathed in chalk for two minutes and loved every second of it...
Remember when Stephanie cut my hair and it turned out really good (suprisingly)...
....but this was the process we had to go through, which was a little nerve racking...
Most of these were from my freshman year at BYU, (the first on is the only exception). Random I know... but they were good times!
Until later,
No longer the lump on the bed
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